12 Signs You’re In An Exclusive Relationship & What It Means
From spending time together to meeting their loved ones, signs that you need to look out for
Originally from Atlanta, Dr. Nancy Irwin graduated from UWG in 1977 with a Bachelor of Music in Opera Performance. She moved to New York City in 1985 to pursue a career as a stand-up comedian. She worked all over the country and abroad and moved to Los Angeles in 1994 when she heard that Hollywood needed more blondes.
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Experience: 4 yearsSneha holds a master’s degree in Applied Linguistics from the University of Hyderabad and a professional Relationship Coach diploma. With over four years of experience in writing, she specializes in crafting insightful articles on relationships and lifestyle.
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Experience: 4 yearsSubhrojyoti is an associate editor at StyleCraze with four years of experience. He has a master’s degree in English from Presidency University, Kolkata, and has also done a post-graduate certificate course in Editing and Publishing from Jadavpur University, Kolkata.
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Experience: 3 yearsGracia Odile is a teacher-turned-beauty and lifestyle writer with three years of professional experience. She holds a bachelor’s degree in English from St. Stephen’s College, a Master’s in Anthropology from the University of Madras, and a degree in education from GGSIPU.
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In This Article
What Does Exclusive Mean In A Relationship?
An exclusive relationship means that you and your partner are dating only each other. A serious relationship needs to be exclusive or monogamous. In this relationship, you stop exploring other options or going on blind dates. You also uninstall the dating apps from your phone and look forward to getting closer and emotionally connected to your partner. Moreover, an exclusive relationship is taking a step further from dating. You move in together, consider your life goals with your partner, and the discourse shifts from “I” to “We”.
Does being exclusive mean the same as being in a relationship? Not necessarily. So, what is the difference between exclusive dating and a relationship? Can a casual relationship be exclusive? Yes, it can if both parties are willing. There are certain things to consider when it comes to exclusive dating vs. relationships. Keep reading for your answer.
Key Takeaways
- An exclusive relationship is when you and your partner see only each other and take a step further from dating.
- Exclusive relationships can transition into committed ones. Both partners evaluate compatibility and scope for a long-term relationship at this phase.
- Imagining a life with them, PDA, and meeting each other’s friends and family are some of the signs of an exclusive relationship.
Difference Between Exclusive Dating And A Relationship
The difference between being exclusive vs. being in a relationship may be confusing. When you are exclusive with someone, you are not seeing other people. This is not the same as being someone’s boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner. However, exclusive dating is a step towards a committed relationship. It is when you like each other enough to stop exploring other avenues but not there yet when it comes to your feelings. A study suggests that an individual’s attachment style can significantly influence their behavior and expectations around exclusivity in a relationship. It stated that individuals with a secure attachment style experience less anxiety and exhibit higher levels of trust than those with an avoidant attachment style. The latter can experience jealousy or a fear of abandonment or might just find difficulty in trusting. Thus, attachment patterns can influence the relationship dynamics in an exclusive relationship and thereby can either positively or negatively influence emotional stability and relationship satisfaction (1).
Dating, exclusive relationship, and commitment are transitional phases. A serious relationship needs to be exclusive, but before that, you should know if your partner is ready for it. When you are dating exclusively, it means you are somewhere in between seeing your partner casually and being in a full-fledged relationship. It is like an internship before you get a full-time job. You are still testing the waters and would like to know them better before taking the plunge.
Before you think about how long you should be exclusive before starting a relationship, it is vital to understand if your relationship shows signs of being exclusive. Check out our next section to find out the clear signs of an exclusive relationship.
12 Signs Your Relationship Is Exclusive
Maybe you have been seeing someone but have not come clean with each other about what you want from this relationship. Are you just hanging out? Do you see them in your future? Would you like this to move towards a mutually exclusive relationship? Before you decide to talk with them, know the signs that indicate what you have is exclusive.
1. You Already Seem Like You Are In An Exclusive Relationship
Even though you have not labeled your relationship, you already seem like a couple. No matter the longevity of the relationship. You do not desire to meet new people or leave each other anytime soon. This is one of the major signs that you are ready to move from casual dating to an exclusive relationship.
2. You Like Spending Time With Your Special Person
One of the prime exclusive relationship rules is communication. If you speak to them regularly and make plans to meet them often, not just for sex, things might get serious. Your special person is already a significant part of your life, and you love spending time with them. You want to share your life with them and can see a future with them.
3. You Have Met Their Acquaintances
If you have met their friends and family and joined them at certain family events, you are probably ready to shift from being exclusive to a relationship. You may have met their co-workers and talked to their friends even in their absence. Being in an exclusive relationship also means being an integral part of your partner’s social circle, and it is great if you are looking for something serious. Being friends with their friends is one of the most wholesome feelings that can also indicate the permanence of the relationship.
Quick TipYou also feel their acquaintances’ approval of you is important as it influences your partner’s perspective. You fear not being perceived as the one for them and this is a major sign that you are in, or wish to be in an exclusive relationship.
4. Arguments Are Not Deal Breakers
Arguments are inevitable in relationships, even more so when you have started seeing each other. If you and your partner have had a disagreement and instead of breaking up, you’ve worked it out together, you might be ready to move forward with them, but there should be assurance regarding the steadfastness of the bond. You need to believe that there is constancy in the relationship despite the arguments. Be it exclusive or a relationship, you have realized that communication is key and talking it out is probably for the best.
5. You Have A Healthy Relationship
In a casual relationship, people may fall out of love easily over various factors. Toxicity may also creep through the crevices of the relationship, creating resentment over time. However, being exclusive in a relationship means that you treat each other well even after the initial pursuit. There are no mixed signals – you can talk about things like honestly, loyalty, and monogamy and be vulnerable with each other, and know the things you should avoid saying when they are upset. Recognizing the signs he cares about you can help you understand the depth of his feelings and commitment. Can you relate to this? If you are nodding your head, you and your partner are definitely exclusive.
6. You Have Told Each Other The Three Magical Words
No, we are not talking about “WiFi is working!” If you have told your significant other ‘I love you’, and they reciprocated your feelings, you are in an exclusive relationship. If there is an answer to the question ‘when should you become exclusive in a relationship?’, it is this, right here after you have said those three words to each other. It shows devotion, faithfulness, and dedication towards the relationship as well as each other. In such relationships, fidelity is the key element to showing trust, reliability, and continuity of the relationship.
7. You Imagine A Future With Them
Becoming exclusive in a relationship takes some time, especially if you are still trying to figure out your feelings for them. Let us help you a little with it! Do you get butterflies when you imagine a future with them? Instead of freaking out, do you feel happy when you picture them with you in the long run? Does the thought of losing them make you upset? If so, talk to them about getting into an exclusive relationship.
8. There Is PDA Involved
Your partner’s social media feed has your photos, and your recent selfie has their comment. You do not shy away from small gestures of affection and intimacy in front of your acquaintances. You may also have a space for their things in your apartment, and they shower you with compliments at every chance. This is what mutually exclusive means in a relationship – when your feelings are not kept a secret from the people around you.
9. You Have Your Own Life
Many people may think exclusivity in a relationship means doing everything together. But it is wrong and can turn things monotonous and toxic very quickly. If you are dating someone and still have your own space to do what you like, and one taking part in individual activities does not make the other feel like they are being neglected, it is a sign of a healthy bond. Every relationship needs space, no matter how long you have been together. Hence, an exclusive relationship does not hamper your personal space but gives you the chance of having stability and dependability in bad situations. Such an exclusive allegiance can help you go through even the toughest of times.
10. You Are Ready For Emotional Intimacy
Feeling ready for emotional closeness is a clear sign that you are in an exclusive relationship. It goes beyond just hanging out – it is about being comfortable enough to share your deeper thoughts and feelings. It is about a trust that lets you open up emotionally that makes a relationship exclusive. So, if you find yourself willing to be more vulnerable and understanding with your partner, it is a strong signal that your relationship is on a deeper, more exclusive level.
11. Fear Of Losing
When you deeply care about someone and the thought of losing them feels unsettling, it is an indication that the relationship holds significant meaning to you. Exclusive relationships often come with a sense of attachment and commitment, creating a fear of losing the person you have chosen to be exclusive with. This is different from an open relationship, where partners agree to have romantic or sexual interactions with others while maintaining their primary relationship.
12. You Have An Open Communication
Open communication is the bedrock of a healthy relationship. The more honest you are with your feelings, expectations, and concerns, the easier it is to be on the same page and avoid misunderstandings. It helps build trust in a relationship, which is important for emotional intimacy and long-term mental well-being. Discussing your feelings safely gives a sense of security and belonging, and relieves anxiety related to commitment. It also ensures that both feel heard and cared for, helping to ease any stress or doubts. However, poor communication tends to create conflicts and emotional stress.
The points stated above can give you a fair idea about exclusivity in a relationship. However, it is important to note that exclusivity in relationships can come with its own set of disadvantages. Let us check out the next section to understand the challenges of being in an exclusive relationship.
Challenges Of Exclusive Relationships
There are several implications of being in an exclusive relationship, and not all of them carry a positive undertone. Here are some of the common challenges that individuals in an exclusive relationship may face.
- Ambiguity
Being in an exclusive relationship is like a testing period where you and your partner get the time to ascertain whether you enjoy this natural progression in the relationship. You only allow the understanding that you agree to be exclusive for the time being but make no promises about the future. This allows you to commit without taking on all the labels or fulfilling the expectations that come with it. However, this lack of clarity can often lead to confusion or unmet expectations. For example, one partner might have long-term plans, while the other might just be figuring things out.
- Poor Communication
Lack of communication or ineffective communication can lead to misunderstandings or conflicts in the relationships. It can create a gap between individuals where they no longer feel supported. They might also make assumptions about the other’s behavior. For example, if a person takes time to reply to a text, then it might be seen as a lack of interest, while in reality, they might just be busy.
- Jealousy
Jealousy can arise in an exclusive relationship if a partner feels insecure or develops distrust in the relationship. It can make them feel inadequate or that they are not good enough. This jealousy, if unchecked, can weaken the bond in the relationship.
- Monotony
Routine activities and a mundane lifestyle can take away the spark of exclusive relationships. It may also take away the fun and excitement, making the relationship feel predictable and uninspiring.
- Conflict Of Interest
Differences in goals, values, beliefs, and aspirations can lead to conflicts in an exclusive relationship. If not addressed properly, it can lead to misunderstanding and create emotional distance.
- Lack Of Commitment
In an exclusive relationship, if there is a lack of commitment even from one side, then it can jeopardize the stability of the relationship. It can create doubts about the future of the relationship, leading to a sense of resentment in the more invested partner.
- Feeling Restrictive
If exclusivity in a relationship is introduced early on, it can make one or both partners feel constrained, especially if they are still understanding their needs and desires. It can also instill the fear of losing one’s freedom.
- Pressure To Demonstrate Commitment
People in an exclusive relationship might feel the pressure to demonstrate their commitment or reassure their partner of their steadfast devotion regularly, which in turn can feel overwhelming at times and strain their dynamic.
- Complacency
Exclusivity in a relationship can lead to complacency. This happens when both partners stop putting in the same effort as they used to at the start of their relationship.
- Neglecting Personal Needs
In an exclusive relationship, both partners may try to place each other’s needs above their own in an effort to prioritize their relationship. This self-sacrificing behavior can lead to unnecessary stress, burnout, or dissatisfaction in the relationship.
If these above-given challenges are tackled efficiently, it can create more healthier and fulfilling exclusive relationships. So, when you transition from a casual dating phase to an exclusive relationship, there needs to be clarity, verbal reassurances, and mutual agreement. This can ensure both the partners feel heard and valued. Let us look at how you can manage such challenges in an exclusive relationship in the next section and explore how to take actionable steps to address these challenges in a proper manner.
How To Deal With Challenges In An Exclusive Relationship?
It is important to constructively address challenges of exclusive relationships to create a more meaningful connection. Here are some ways to deal with these challenges:
- Express Your Feelings Cleary
Feelings and intentions should be distinctly expressed while helping the partners move in the same direction regarding the exclusivity of the relationship. This ensures both partners are on the same page and are well aware of each other’s needs, desires, dreams, beliefs, and expectations.
- Discuss Your Future
Have more open talks about the future, values, and the goal of the relationship as well. It is possible that the issue of “exclusivity” may mean something different to the other person, and may open up discussions of boundaries or fears and concerns involved.
- Build Trust
Look for ways to demonstrate your loyalty and commitment to your partner. You can exhibit this by spending quality time with them, showing physical affection, or staying connected. This can help reduce the feeling of jealousy and help you foster mutual trust and respect in the relationship.
- Avoid Monotony
Explore new activities, new interests, and hobbies together. You can also plan surprises like a weekend getaway or your partner’s favorite homecooked meal to keep the spark alive in your exclusive relationship.
- Resolve Conflicts In A Constructive Manner
Listen to each other’s concerns and problems actively. Show empathy, respond with understanding, and work together to find solutions to your relationship problems. This can help strengthen your relationship and reinforce your commitment to them.
- Set Your Boundaries And Maintain Your Individuality
It is important to set clear boundaries and ensure that they are being respected in your relationship. So, determine what your boundaries are and communicate openly about them to your partner. In addition to this, always make sure to maintain your individuality and not lose yourself in a relationship. Take time out for your hobbies, interests, and yourself.
Talking about these important topics would lay the foundation for both partners and give them assurance as they continued toward an exclusive relationship.
Quick TipInfographic: Types Of Romantic Relationships
All romantic relationships do not function in the same way. The individuality of the people involved in a relationship strongly determines what kind of relationship it is. Check out the infographic below to know more about the common types of romantic relationships. Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team
Deciding to become exclusive is making forward progress in a relationship. The time frame to make this decision will vary from person to person. Only after you know a considerable deal about your partner and figure out your feelings, will you look for exclusivity in the relationship. Once you are certain about them, you need to be honest about your feelings toward them. Initiate the “exclusive relationship talk” if you are on the same page. You may also feel inclined to be exclusive but not in a serious relationship.
Being in an exclusive relationship is delightful, but if your partner does not want the same things, it will be best to end things before you get hurt. You have every right to choose what is best for you.
Being in an exclusive relationship is delightful, but if your partner does not want the same things, it will be best to end things before you get hurt. You have every right to choose what is best for you.
Frequently Asked Questions
How long should you date exclusively before a relationship?
There is no exact timeline and it varies from couple to couple. However, most couples date exclusively for two to three months before entering into a relationship.
How many dates before you become exclusive?
Ideally, ten to twelve dates is considered enough time to gauge your depth of feelings for a person before becoming exclusive.
How do you tell someone you are not exclusive?
You should start by apologizing and having an honest conversation with the person. Tell them the reasons why you do not want to be exclusive. Be honest and respectfully convey about the future of this relationship.
Illustration: Signs You Are In An Exclusive Relationship & What It Means
Image: Dall·E/StyleCraze Design Team
Here’s a short video to help you understand if your new love wants an exclusive relationship:
Ready to take your relationship to the next level? Learn when to make it exclusive in this helpful video below. Click to play!
References
Articles on StyleCraze are backed by verified information from peer-reviewed and academic research papers, reputed organizations, research institutions, and medical associations to ensure accuracy and relevance. Read our editorial policy to learn more.
- Exclusivity in romantic relationships as a function of early adult attachment styles
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/287188881_Exclusivity_in_romantic_relationships_as_a_function_of_early_adult_attachment_styles
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