5 Signs You Are A Hopeless Romantic & How To Stop Being One

If you daydream a lot and fall in love easily, you may be a hopeless romantic!

Reviewed by LaTonya MeChelle, Love & Relationship Coach LaTonya MeChelle LaTonya MeChelleLove & Relationship Coach facebook_icontwitter_iconlinkedin_iconyoutube_iconinsta_icon
Written by Sneha Tete, Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Sneha Tete Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach linkedin_icon Experience: 4 years
Edited by Asmita De, MA (English) Asmita De MA (English) linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years
Fact-checked by Reshma Latif, BSc Reshma Latif BSc linkedin_icon Experience: 5 years
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Who is a hopeless romantic? A hopeless romantic is essentially someone who still believes in love despite negative experiences in the past. While many may speak ill of this ideology, it has its share of benefits. A hopeless romantic gives all he can in a relationship and expects the other person to reciprocate in the same way. They commit to the relationship completely and love beyond any boundaries and limits.

However, the world is not what they think, and they are susceptible to disappointments. So, there are surely some drawbacks of being driven by this romantic ideology. That said, should you be a hopeless romantic or not? Read on to find out.

What It Means To Be A Hopeless Romantic

What it means to be a hopeless romantic
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There are only two sides to being a hopeless romantic; they are often wanted but also criticized. A hopeless romantic is the one who is always head-over-heels in love. Nobody loves as they do. Being a hopeless romantic, you will always find joy and contentment in the little things of your relationship. You will be seen romanticizing good over bad most of the time, imagining scenarios, surprises, and so much more in your head.

Against all negative past experiences and a seemingly unhealthy present, a hopeless romantic embraces love even when it is a red flag pointing straight at them, waving a hello. They get emotionally invested, feel like they have found their soulmate, and get attached from the very beginning without analyzing what lies ahead of them.

A hopeless romantic may sound like someone who is all gooey, chirpy, unreal, and madly in love, but they don’t always have positive experiences from their love affairs. Reality strikes hard when they face the harsh truth. And that’s when hopeless romantics hit rock bottom. However, they must learn to balance the reality and fantasy of love to enjoy their love life without getting hurt.

Hopeless romantics are eternal optimists and dreamers who indulge in excessive sentimentality. Whether it is a red flag or a do-or-die situation, they tend to try to make their way out of it. However, if you are wondering what makes you one, fret not. We have all the signs or symptoms covered. Scroll down to learn.

Key Takeaways

  • A hopeless romantic often fails to see the red flags in a relationship.
  • A hopeless romantic is found fantasizing a lot. They imagine the relationship to be blissful even when it is not and begin to make marriage plans immediately at times.
  • It is not always harmful to be a hopeless romantic, but it is essential to be practical and optimistic and communicate well with the partner and be aware of the challenges accompanied by relationships.

Signs You Might Be A Hopeless Romantic

Signs that you are a hopeless romantic
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  • You Daydream A Lot

Are you someone who has their marriage planned even though you might be single? If you know which wedding songs you will dance to, how you will doll up for your engagement, and what your future partner looks sounds or looks like, you are one true hopeless romantic! You are often lost in thoughts, daydreaming about your future partner, already in love with the idea of love, without actually being in love.

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As a hopeless romantic, you may also have a long list of people you have crushes on and, most likely than not, have pages of diary dedicated to scribbles about them and saved souvenirs from your moments together.
  • You Fall In Love Fast And Easy

Most people take time to fall in love. They analyze, discover, and prepare themselves for what the relationship might look like in the future. However, hopeless romantics are idealists and likely to fall in love hard and fast, as soon as they enter the relationship or even much before it starts. You idealize your partner, irrespective of who they really are, setting unreal expectations from the relationship. A hopeless romantic doesn’t differentiate between infatuation and love.

A blogger admits to being a hopeless romantic and reflects on her earlier perceptions of love. Recalling her past, she shares, “These twisted romance story ideals led me to have my first sort of “romantic fling” in high school; I wouldn’t even call it a relationship, it was so insignificant and brief. A boy showed me attention for the first time and I gushed over it, high with the idea of someone loving me (i).”

  • You Are Blindfolded In Love

Hopeless romantics overlook red flags until they are deep into the relationship.

You dive deep into the flowery relationship with all the reasons you think made you fall in love. Even if you notice potential problems and issues, you skip those by convincing yourself it can never overpower your love and affection. However, ignoring a problem doesn’t make it disappear. When you are done with honeymooning in the relationship, you discover potential differences that may be roadblocks in your bond.

  • You Face Love-Bombing

Hopeless romantics get into relationships easily, quickly make a commitment, and imagine their partners to be a certain way.

As a result, you may find yourself in toxic relationships. The realizations dawn upon hopeless romantics when the spark is lost. You fall prey to manipulative decisions, dramatic explanations lacking logic, and even false promises. Once the fairy tale love runs out of the reel, toxicity plays on repeat.

  • You Have An Idealized Vision Of Love

Hopeless romantics tend to have a fixed idea of what romance should be like. They are mostly motivated by novels and movies and end up having unreal expectations from their real life partner. This may sound dreamy and feel good at first, but eventually, it will wear your partner out. It will also disappoint you when the realities of life do not match up with the fantasies in your head.

  • You End Up In One-Sided Relationships
Being in one-sided relationships as one of the signs of a hopeless romantic
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Not every relationship is based on a 50:50 ratio. Sometimes, they are 70:30, and sometimes, 60:40. However, a balance is maintained. But, hopeless romantics are more on the giving side, as they invest more unlikely of their partners. You end up feeling too much to bring alive your imaginary vision into the picture. Due to this, you end up receiving less and ending up in a one-sided relationship.

There is nothing fundamentally wrong with being a hopeless romantic. However, such people live far away from reality, investing in their imaginary world to the extent of losing themselves. Even when they realize the reality doesn’t align with their vision, they leave the relationship incomplete and premature. Hopeless romantics also have challenging breakups where they lose confidence in themselves.

Now that you know you’re a hopeless romantic, there are some things you really need to consider. You should be well aware of the implications of being a hopeless romantic, as there can be both positive and negative impacts. Scroll down to explore them in detail.

Implications Of Being A Hopeless Romantic

Hopeless romantics value love and idealize their lovers intensely. Their hope for an ideal love shapes and influences their beliefs, expectations, and emotional well-being. While being a hopeless romantic can help them develop strong connections, it can also lead them to have unrealistic expectations and be emotionally vulnerable. Continue reading to uncover the key implications of being a hopeless romantic.

  • Pros And Cons  

Positive Implications

  • Hopeless romantics love intensely and with honesty. So, they can build strong, meaningful, and passionate relationships. 
  • They are optimistic about love and believe in its power. Therefore, they are more resilient to challenging situations and can strengthen the core of the relationship. 
  • Hopeless romantics think much about their partners and tend to express their love with grand and meaningful gestures. They make their partners feel cherished and valued. 
  • They are very committed to their partners and are loyal. They yearn for stability in their relationships and put in their best efforts to solidify their bond. 
  • These people are idealists. They believe in loving extraordinarily and inspire people, influencing their perception of romance and intimacy positively. 

Negative Implications

  • The idealist perception of the romance of hopeless romantics may burst when their partners do not match their energies. Their unrealistic expectations can cause disappointment. 
  • Hopeless romantics often ignore red flags and believe that their love will change their partners. However, when their toxic partners continue hurting them, they feel disheartened and pessimistic. 
  • These people are usually more emotionally invested in their partner. They are so involved that their mood depends on their partners’ behavior. However, this can backfire and cause emotional distress, making them prone to serious heartbreak. 
  • The modern dating scenario is marked by casual and fast-paced connections. This can ultimately frustrate the hopeless romantics as they will fail to make fruitful and serious connections. 
  • Hopeless romantics thrive on love, affection, and romance. They depend too much on their relationships for happiness, neglecting their personal needs and hopes. This can ultimately weaken their personalities and make them too dependent. 
  • Cultural Impact Of Being A Hopeless Romantic

Being a hopeless romantic can manifest differently in different cultures. Cultural norms and societal expectations play a crucial role in determining how hopeless romantics find a balance between their idealist concept of love and reality. Let’s understand these cultural nuances and how they make hopeless romantics feel. 

  • Western Cultures: In Western countries, media representations of romance and love determine the ideals of love. They emphasize grand gestures and highlight the ‘soulmate’ storyline largely. This can influence hopeless romantics to express their love in a heartfelt and larger-than-life manner. However, with the emergence of casual dating and online relationships, they may find themselves struggling to build serious bonds. 
  • Eastern Cultures: In countries like Japan, China, and India, family plays a crucial role in influencing your conception of love and relationships. Family teaches people to find a partner who has common goals and interests. They emphasize more on nurturing and stable relationships that have a practical foundation. However, a hopeless romantic can find it difficult to balance his idealist expectations of love with societal pressure for stable and strategic relationships. 
  • Middle-Eastern And South-Asian Cultures: Traditional values play a significant role in relationships. Hopeless romantics find it difficult to prioritize customs and responsibilities over their idealistic hopes for a beautiful romantic relationship. 
  • African Cultures: Community and family expectations influence relationships largely, often compelling people to build bonds out of responsibility keeping in mind practical considerations like finances. Hopeless romantics might find it difficult to adjust to the pre-created relationships and fail to bond on a deeper level. They struggle when their concept of love conflicts with the traditional matchmaking customs. 

As you can see, being a hopeless romantic comes with its own set of negative implications. In worst-case scenarios, people turn pessimistic, become emotionally unavailable, and may lose faith in love altogether. They must stay grounded and acknowledge love being a strong feeling that can bring both happiness and challenges. In the next section, we have discussed how hopeless romantics navigate their relationships effectively. Read on. 

How Can Hopeless Romantics Navigate Relationships Wisely? 

Hopeless romantics view love as a transformative experience and seek fairytale romance. Although they can build fulfilling relationships, their idealistic expectations can lead to disappointments and heartbreaks. Navigating relationships filled with challenges requires a balance between idealism and realism. Here are some bits of relationship advice to hopeless romantics: 

  1. Be Realistic: Hopeless romantics should understand that fairytale love as depicted in movies and books is far from reality. In real life, a strong relationship will go through ups and downs and require sincere patience and belief in love. 
  2. Set Healthy Expectations: Hopeless romantics must accept that being in love and showing care and affection for your partner is not always simple. Relationships can go through challenges and having arguments with your partner is common. So, they must set healthy expectations from their partners but be ready to deal with setbacks. 
  3. Prioritize Emotional Well-Being: Hopeless romantics think more about their relationships and get emotionally vulnerable when their partners knowingly or unknowingly hurt them. They feel a lot and are prone to heartbreaks. So, they must try to hone their emotional strength and face problems with confidence. Focusing on personal growth is crucial as it builds self-love and independence. 
  4. Never Ignore Red Flags: Love should be a two-way thing, not one-sided. You must be aware of the red flags and address them right away to avoid romanticizing toxicity. 
  5. Communicate Honestly: Hopeless romantics develop a silly romantic psychology. They expect their partner to magically understand their emotions and show love in the exact way they want. However, that is not possible unless your partner is as hopeless as you are in love. Communicate your feelings and expectations openly to not keep your partner guessing. 
  6. Enjoy the Present Moment With Your Partner: Hopeless romantics think of how they would like a future with their partner and have idealistic expectations for the upcoming time. They do not enjoy the present moment with their partner to the fullest. Love grows with time and with shared experiences. So, you must try to appreciate and enjoy your relationship as it unfolds. 
  7. Recognize The Love Language Of Your Partner: Not everyone loves grand gestures and heightened expressions of love. Some may consider deeper conversations and silent care as the real definition of love. So, try to analyze the love language of your partner and shower them with care in the way they want.

Well, why fall for hopelessness when you can be a hopeful romantic? Let’s find out how to stop being a hopeless romantic.

How To Stop Being A Hopeless Romantic?

How to stop being a hopeless romantic
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  • Be Practical

Have your set of expectations and ideologies about love and relationships but keep them in check when you pursue someone. The step is to know the characteristics of real love. Do not blindly indulge in dating or give in to passions without analyzing your and the to-be partner’s expectations. Align your possibilities and disadvantages, think about the hiccups, and don’t ignore the red flags.

  • Communicate
Openly communicate to understand and deal with the relationship better
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Communication is the key to every unopened door. Talk about every minute detail that you think matters or will come into play in the longer run. Open communication will help you understand and analyze better. You can identify the issues and, most likely, find a way to deal with them, too. Have a rational mind while communicating.

  • Be Aware Of The Post-Honeymoon Period

Relationships are interesting and a lot more joyful in the initial days. Don’t be scared or lose hope as soon as you see the spark fading away. Hold your ground and believe in your partner and the relationship. Be ready to face some challenges with faith and practicality. Don’t be scared of the reality that walks in.

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The honeymoon period is widely believed to last anywhere between 6 to 24 months into a new relationship.
  • Be Optimistic

Do not be terrified by the red flags or seeing relationships fall out. On the contrary, be optimistic that you can always find love. That said, you should also be alert to the flood of emotions relationships bring. Don’t overthink or romanticize drama and emotions. Take feelings as they come but think them through very rationally. Do not let overindulgence ruin your sense of self.

  • Don’t Settle For Less

A hopeless romantic often settles for less. Instead, remind yourself how worthy you are of better things. Do not settle for less thinking love will always find a way to happiness. Set boundaries and draw milestones for yourself and your relationship. If you don’t feel safe, sound, and secure in a relationship, gather the courage to walk out. Do not sit back, hoping things will get better. Try to make things better but never at the cost of your sanity.

  • Maintain A Balance

It is important to strike a balance between reality and being imaginative. Being all practical can also dampen the spark of your relationship, so finding the middle ground is necessary. Maybe once in a while, you can unleash the hopeless romantic in you and sweep your partner off their feet, instead of expecting them to read your mind and sweep you off yours. But other times, try to keep an open mind and see how your partner feels about your idea of romance.

You are now armed with the knowledge that will keep you grounded in reality when it comes to relationships. However, it is important to know the difference between being hopeless and a hopeful romantic.

Hopeless Romantic Vs. Hopeful Romantic

A hopeless romantic views love through rose-tinted lenses, often expecting an unrealistically fairy-tale-like experience. Any romantic relation needs an honest emotional connection from both sides. Despite facing setbacks or heartbreaks, you persist in your pursuit of a dreamy love story.

On the other hand, a hopeful romantic approaches love with optimism, embracing the journey with an open heart while acknowledging the imperfections and disappointments that come with real relationships. You believe in the potential for genuine connection and personal growth, finding joy in the shared experiences and even heartbreaks that love brings.
While a hopeless romantic is driven by unattainable fantasies, a hopeful romantic seeks fulfillment in the genuine and imperfect beauty of love’s reality.

Infographic: 5 Signs To Show You Are A Hopeless Romantic

Do you wonder why you fall in love easily every time, even after many a heartbreak? Do you give your all in a relationship and love beyond boundaries? It might be because you are a hopeless romantic. Are you still trying to figure it out? Check out the 5 signs of a hopeless romantic in the infographic below.

5 signs to show you are a hopeless romantic (infographic)

Illustration: StyleCraze Design Team

Being a hopeless romantic has benefits as well as drawbacks. It is fantastic because no one loves people as much as you do. It is amazing how much you respect and acknowledge every little thing and how your empathy outweighs all the problems. However, being so engrossed in love, kindness, and feelings may cost you later in life when it comes to dating, as you may be taken for a fool and taken advantage of. Therefore, it is better to be a “hopeful” romantic, where optimism meets maturity and discernment. When and while you fall in love, keep your hopeless romantic side in check and make good use of your senses. Everything else will ultimately fall into place.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are some common misconceptions about hopeless romantics?

Many people believe that hopeless romantics are unrealistic about love or too naive. However, they often possess a deep understanding of emotional connections. Despite their unrealistic expectations of love, they wear their heart on their sleeve and openly communicate their feelings.

Is being a hopeless romantic a good thing?

Everyone deserves to experience unconditional love. But hopeless romantics harm nobody but themselves. It is not wrong or bad to be one. But it is always better to be a hopeless romantic with all the awareness. Be open to the hiccups, the good vibes, the roadblocks, and everything else. This way, you will be less hurt and more aware and responsible of your actions and decisions.

Do hopeless romantics fall in love fast?

Yes. Hopeless romantics fall in love faster than anybody else since they greatly value the matters of the heart. They jump into a relationship without thinking of the negatives. It is often seen that hopeless romantics overlook all red flags and hiccups, idealizing their romanticized version of love and a relationship.

Does a hopeless romantic believe in love at first sight?

Hopeless romantics might believe in love at first sight, as they often think there is one perfect person for everyone. However, in some other cases, they might not fall in love quickly but long for their former partners hopelessly even if the partners move on.

What is the difference between a hopeless romantic and a realist?

Hopeless romantics live in fantasies and strongly believe that one day they will meet their soulmate and everything will fall into place. Meanwhile, while realists do believe in love, they do not ignore the bumps on the love road and live in reality, unlike hopeless romantics.

Can a hopeless romantic be happy without being in a relationship?

Hopeless romantics tend to plan their romance and life out with a person they like even when they have never talked to that person before. They live in the love bubble imagining the happy life they can have with their soulmate. However, all of this might come tumbling down if they are not careful or ignore the red flags.

How can a hopeless romantic find a partner who shares their romantic ideals?

Hopeless romantics need to let go of the fantasy and understand that every person has a different love language. They need to observe if their partner is also putting in the effort or if it is just them trying to make the relationship work. They need to communicate with their partner to make sure that both parties are on the same page.

Are you a hopeless romantic? Find out in this video if you are not sure! This video provides 10 signs that indicate you may be a hopeless romantic.

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LaTonya MeChelle
LaTonya MeChelleLove & Relationship Coach
LaTonya MeChelle is not your typical love and relationship coach. Her matchmaking skills are unique, and she is the type of life coach that makes you appreciate looking in the mirror. Her coaching techniques are far from traditional but as effective as they come.

Read full bio of LaTonya MeChelle
Sneha Tete
Sneha TeteBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Sneha holds a master’s degree in Applied Linguistics from the University of Hyderabad and a professional Relationship Coach diploma. With over four years of experience in writing, she specializes in crafting insightful articles on relationships and lifestyle.

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Asmita De
Asmita DeAssociate Editor
Asmita De is an associate editor with over three years of experience. She graduated in English Literature from the University of Calcutta. She has collaborated with several digital companies and reputed publishing houses as an editor.

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Reshma Latif
Reshma LatifBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Reshma is a content writer with a penchant for writing articles on relationships, makeup, and beauty. She started her writing career in 2007, soon after graduating from Mahatma Gandhi University. What began as a love for blogging bloomed into several freelancing opportunities over the years.

Read full bio of Reshma Latif