42 Helpful Tips To Help You Be A Good Husband To Your Wife

Follow these steps to affirm your commitment to making your marriage last a lifetime.

Reviewed by Amanda Bennallack, Relationship Coach Amanda Bennallack Amanda BennallackRelationship Coach facebook_iconlinkedin_iconyoutube_icon
Written by Sneha Tete, Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach Sneha Tete Integrated MA, Certified Relationship Coach linkedin_icon Experience: 4 years
Edited by Asmita De, MA (English) Asmita De MA (English) linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years
Fact-checked by Gracia Odile, MA Gracia Odile MA linkedin_icon Experience: 3 years
Last Updated on

Marriage is more than just a wonderful wedding ceremony. A good marriage is one where both, the wife and husband, learn to put each other first. So, if you are looking for some helpful tips on how to be a good husband to your wife, take a seat!

You may have known your partner for years or just met her a few months or weeks ago. But marriage takes a great deal of understanding, patience, and love. Being a good husband to your wife can sometimes mean just letting her vent out to you and listening to what she has to say. You may also have to go beyond your comfort zone to show you love her.

Need some guidance? Scroll down to check out our helpful tips on how you can be a good husband to your wife and show her that she is your everything. Swipe up!

40 Tips To Make You A Better Husband

1. Be There For Her

When you are married to someone, being there for them is absolutely essential. Your wife may be going through a distressful or happy period in her life, and the fact that you are there to listen to her is an important sign of a healthy relationship.

2. Really Listen To Her

Just pretending to listen to her is not enough. Ask her open-ended questions and try to really understand what is bothering her. Do not scroll on your phone when she is talking to you. Cut your buddy’s call and be present in the conversation.

3. Do Not Be Judgemental Or Give Undue Advice

She might just want someone to give her a kind and patient ear when she talks about things. Judging her experience or giving her unsolicited advice may make her feel less capable. And in a successful marriage, you do not want her to feel that way.

4. Do Not Snap At Her

We all have bad days. But, the last person you should take it out on is your wife. Whether she is the reason behind your frustration or it is something completely unrelated to your relationship, she does not deserve to be spoken to rudely.

5. Take Her Opinions Seriously

She is an emotionally mature person, and her advice can be extremely valid for your problems. If she is suggesting something, be open to her influence and take her seriously and pay heed to her advice. This is a great way of strengthening an already happy marriage.

6. Create A Safe Space For Her

Another thing to remember for being a good husband and building a strong bond with your wife is that she needs to know that she can share the most intimate details of her life with you without expecting a negative reaction from you. Even when she shares something about your marriage, be patient and try to understand where she’s coming from.

7. Tell Her What Annoys You But With Kindness

When you are a married couple, it is easy to find flaws in your partner and criticize them for their behavior. But, do not constantly criticize her. Instead, tell her nicely what you dislike and what you would prefer done differently. Focus on what you do want , not what you don’t want. While you do this, also encourage her to do the same.

8. Do Not Get Defensive

When she tells you about any of your behaviors that she dislikes, do not try to justify yourself and try to divert the conversation. This is where you need to practice some patience. Listen to her worries calmly and then provide her with an alternative solution.

9. Your Fight Is Not Against Her

It is easy to lose sight of your relationship in a conflict while seeing the other person as your enemy. Remember that it is always the problem versus you and your wife – and not you versus her. You are trying to solve an issue as a team, so do not perceive her as the problem.

10. Take Turns Talking In A Heated Situation

It is not easy to take a step back and be logical when tempers are running high. But, look at it as a negotiation. You present your side of the problem, then give them a chance to talk. Listen to understand, not listen to respond. Then, like a mature couple, focus on finding a solution together that will work for both of you. Keep your voices low and be considerate of the other person.

11. Know When To Take A Break

Some fights can go on forever without reaching a conclusion. In such situations, ask for a timeout and go for a walk or do something to calm you down. Sometimes, you need to clear your mind and get your perspectives right. Then, come back with a more composed frame of mind.

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Image: Shutterstock

12. Do Not Shy Away From Apologizing

There’s no shame in being wrong. You are a human being, and you do not always need to be right. Swallow your ego and say sorry to her. It takes a mature person to accept their mistakes, apologize, and work toward the type of relationship you want.

13. Do Not Dredge Up The Past

It is easy to bring up past mistakes and trust issues during an argument. Neither of you should be bringing up things from your individual or shared pasts to make it worse. If you see yourself doing that, stop right away. If your partner does it, you have every right to politely ask them to concentrate on the issue at hand.

14. Make Important Decisions With Their Counsel

A good way to be a good husband is to not make decisions for the both of you. Always consult your partner when making a big decision. You need to know if they are okay with it before you make them do something.

15. Talk About Your Emotions

Be honest about how you are feeling. It is of utmost importance that you do not let your emotions sit around and build up into something toxic. Make your partner your safe space as well, and establish a dynamic where you are heard without judgment and with empathy.

16. Do The Little Things To Make Them Feel Special

Put a bouquet on their work desk. Pick up their favorite food on your way home. Run a warm bath for them when they are stressed out. Show them that you are there for them. Let them know that you still think they are special and that you want to spend quality time with them.

17. Take Care Of Yourself

When you are in a committed relationship, it is easy to forget that you need to take care of yourself. But, your partner wants nothing more than to see you healthy and fit. As you grow older, it becomes more important to exercise and keep your body in good shape. Go for regular health check-ups and watch your diet. Make sure you are staying fit for yourself and your partner!

18. Make An Effort With Your Partner’s Family

In many cultures, your spouse’s family is a part of the deal. And since such marriages tend to be family affairs,  you need to try your best to respect and love your partner’s parents as your own.

19. Be Friends With Their Friends

Since your partner is coming to your boy’s outings and mingling with them, you should also try to get along with their group of friends. Hang out at the bottomless brunches or go to that barbecue. Bring out your charming side and sense of humor and try to learn more about the people closest to your partner.

20. Talk To Them About Things That Excite You

Marriage is a lot about compromise, but it is not just that. Find time to talk to your partner about the things that make your eyes go wide and your heart race. Tell them about your favorite things and share your excitement and happiness.

21. Give Your Partner Some Space When They Need It

They need your support, but they might also need time off to rest and recuperate from their hectic life. Whatever their job is, always make sure that you ask them if they need space and give it to them.

22. Do Not Bring Work Back Home

Do not forget to maintain the balance between your personal life and work life. Make it a point to finish your work and come back home without the baggage of deadlines, unless it is unavoidable.

23. Leave Love Notes Around The House

Small notes telling your partner things that remind you

of them around the house are extremely romantic. Make it a habit to do this and make them feel special and loved.

24. Do The Things You Did When You Were Dating

Reading together or binge-watching a trashy reality show after a hard day’s work is always a great idea. Do not let marriage ruin simple pleasures. Try to make time for your pre-marriage rituals.

protip_icon Quick Tip
Creating a “memory jar” with notes about cherished moments can be a heartwarming way to celebrate your journey together and reflect on the joyous times.

25. Make Time For Some Good, Old Romance

Everyone wants a weekend trip by the beach or a date night at a fancy restaurant. Plan them and make them happen. Keep the love and romance alive amidst the responsibilities of adult life.

26. Help Them Around The House

An easy hack for being a good husband is sharing the domestic labor of a relationship. Be different and do chores around the house to diminish your partner’s stress without them asking you to do so.

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Image: Shutterstock

27. Have “Dad Days” With Your Kids

A great way to give mommy a break? Take the kids out by yourself. It gives your partner some time for some much-need self-care and allows you to bond with your children one on one!

Dr. Jonathan Ramachenderan, a blogger, reflected on his journey to becoming a better partner. He said, “Quite simply, free from the distraction of the news and social media feeds, focussed solely on my family, work and self-care, I’ve found tremendous peace and the results in my life have been stunning (i).” He shares valuable insights, emphasizing the importance of esteeming one’s wife, supporting her pursuits, and organizing meaningful date nights.

28. Show Your Appreciation

Tell your partner how much you appreciate the smalls things that they achieve. It doesn’t only have to be a big promotion. Applaud their perfect omelet flip or their seamless parallel parking skills!

29. Do Not Fight In Public

Do not have a fight in public. Even if something bothers you when you are in the company of others, do not call your partner out then and there. There is nothing more humiliating than your spouse making a scene in public.

30. Do Not Bad Mouth Your Partner Behind Their Back, Not Even As A Joke

It is easy to make fun of or complain about your spouse with your buddies but try hard not to participate in this behavior. You never know how it will get back to your spouse and hurt them. And no one really wants to hurt a person that they dearly love and adore.

31. Show Your Loyalty

Make a real effort to show your spouse that you have your eyes only on them. Often in long marriages, it is easy to suspect the other person of being disloyal. Hence, you need to assure your partner that they are the only person in your life.

32. Remember The Important Dates

Birthdays, anniversaries, and those days that are special only to the two of you – set reminders for them and do something to make your spouse feel extra special.

34. Keep Your Promises

Do not promise to go to a movie with them and then cancel last minute. You must keep the small promises to show that you will honor the bigger ones.

35. Call Them Up Just Because

A great way to be a good husband is to communicate with your partner when you don’t actually need to. Give them a random call, send a romantic text, ask them what they ate for lunch, and tell them that you love them on a random Tuesday afternoon.

protip_icon Pro Tip
Surprise your wife by taking her to the place where you first met or had your memorable date. Nostalgia can reignite the spark and deepen your connection.

36. Continue Flirting

So what if you have been married for a while? The fire of your passion is still burning bright. Flirt with your spouse like it’s the first time you have seen them. Keep the love going.

37. Surprise Them In Bed

It is easy to lose the spark in bed and stick to the mundane routines. So, suggest trying new things and ask your spouse what they would like to experiment with. Like with the flirting, keep the fire going!

38. Be Honest About Your Finances

Be upfront about your financial situation. It is important because your money impacts your partner directly and your family at large. If you are in a tough situation, they might even be able to help you get out of it.

39. Do Not Have Ridiculous Expectations

It is good to have expectations from your marriage and your spouse. But, do not have outlandish ones. Keep them real and communicate them to your spouse so that you both can work toward them.

40. Don’t Let The Marriage Get Old

You will grow old with the person you love. But, do not let this beautiful relationship of yours get old. Keep reinventing the love, keep revisiting the romance, and keep the spark alive!

41. Express Gratitude

Whether it is a simple “thank you” or a thoughtful thank you note, taking the time to show your wife how much you are grateful to her and how much she means to you is a great way to build a relationship. Not only does it build mutual respect, but it also helps strengthen the bond between you and your wife.

42. Be A Good Role Model

Being a good husband involves being a positive role model for your spouse. By leading with integrity, respecting her as an equal, and continuously striving to be the best version of yourself, you become a role model worth emulating. A strong marital foundation often relies on the example set by both partners, which benefits both you and your wife.

Marriage is a bond that comes late into your life but becomes one of the most intimate ones over time. Therefore, you should put in the effort and make sure that it stays blissful over the years by knowing how to be a good husband. For instance, you should always stand by your wife, consider her opinions seriously, and be kind while communicating anything that might bother you. Furthermore, you should have faith in her and understand that both of you are on the same team.

Frequently Asked Questions

What are the duties of a good husband?

A good husband must love his wife unconditionally, be there for her in every situation, spend more quality time with her, and protect and treat her well.

How should a husband treat his wife?

A husband should treat his wife with dignity, listen to her, always make decisions together, respect her desires and privacy, be her support system, and never miss a chance to show appreciation.

Key Takeaways

  • One of the best tips to being a good spouse to your partner is to be there for them.
  • Another way that really speaks to female partners is being attentive and hearing them out.
  • A great way to show your partner they matter to you is to be emotionally open and honest.
  • Another great way for a husband to rekindle love is to revisit your dating days, maybe even take your partner out on a date.

Discover how to be a better husband. Watch this captivating video and learn insightful strategies, useful advice on building closer relationships, and strengthening your relationship with your partner.

Personal Experience: Source

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Amanda Bennallack
Amanda BennallackRelationship Coach
Amanda is a relationship coach with more than a decade of experience and a deep understanding of interpersonal dynamics and communication. After studying life coaching at The International Coaching Institute, she expanded her education by studying Emotional Intimacy and Emotionally Focused Therapy.

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Sneha Tete
Sneha TeteBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Sneha has a master's degree in Applied Linguistics from the University of Hyderabad, a professional Relationship Coach diploma, and over four years of experience in writing. She writes about relationships and lifestyle.Sneha began her career as an instructional designer, shifted to freelance technical and research writing, and self-published a novella on the theme of adolescent mental health.

Read full bio of Sneha Tete
Asmita De
Asmita DeAssociate Editor
Asmita De is an associate editor with over three years of experience. She graduated in English Literature from the University of Calcutta. She has collaborated with several digital companies and reputed publishing houses as an editor.

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Gracia Odile
Gracia OdileBeauty & Lifestyle Writer
Gracia Odile is a teacher-turned-beauty and lifestyle writer with three years of professional experience. She has a bachelor's degree in English from St. Stephen's College, a master's in Anthropology from the University of Madras, and a degree in education from GGSIPU.

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