How To Make Friends As An Adult: Easy Tips That Always Work

How to make friends as an adult is a common question in every introvert’s mind. And not just the introverts, this process becomes awkward and difficult for all of us with age. What seemed effortless as kids may require a lot of thought and planning to execute in adult life. A bar of chocolate will not win you a friend anymore because your mature heart needs more assurance. Also, our past experiences make us skeptical about opening up to someone and that’s what keeps us from creating new friendships. If you find it difficult to come out of your comfort zone and network with new people, we might be able to help you. Swipe up to find out how.

How To Make Friends As An Adult?

How to break this barrier? How do we start? How to make friends as an adult? Well, the first important thing is that you have to identify that you are not the only one. Who knows? The person opposite to you might be feeling the same way as you do. Maybe your awkwardness or cluelessness on where to start a conversation and how to keep it going are some of the grave reasons. So, address them first. Which means talk about them. That itself will help you strike a conversation and break the ice. You and the other person might feel at ease with just addressing these issues, and you won’t feel shy talking any further now that you have let out the truth.

In a survey conducted among 2,195 UK adults about friendship, it was found that 36% of them find it fairly easy to make friends, while 35% of them found it fairly difficult to make friends, and 16% of them find it very difficult to make friends. It shows that making new friends can be difficult for some and easy for others.

Once that’s done, why not try a blind friend date. Go through your social circle, ask your existing friends to set you up for a friendship date. You really have to be open and free here. If not, try social media or apps. Meetups, peanut, Bumble BFF, and so on should help. Instagram and Facebook itself give you a lot of recommendations. Based on the groups you follow, you can find people with interests that match with yours.

Also, go to social events and those family events and try your luck there. Do not restrict yourself to only your circle. That is one factor that needs changing, remember?

Another fact you have to keep in mind is that you don’t need quantity but quality. You don’t have to juggle learning how to make more friends as an adult. Making 20 new friends and struggling to keep a good contact may stress you. You instead want to have two or three friends whom you actually sync with well.

Remember, seeking shared activities or interests is key. Building friendships based on shared activities or interests can create a relaxed, natural environment where relationships can grow effortlessly.

Quick Tip

When trying to know a stranger, start with a general introduction about yourself and your preferences.

Phew! Now you can finally stop thinking about how to make friends as an adult! But wait. Is that all? Def not! We have more to discuss. Continue reading.

A good addition to this section could be emphasizing the role of finding shared activities or common interests in order to build friendships as these can create a more natural, casual and comfortable environment for friendships to develop.

Why Do Friends Matter In Adulthood?

I can bet, in this process, you might feel a little odd, nervous or awkward. It is only obvious. But what needs to be done is to remember why you are doing this. You might be insecure about what if this doesn’t work. Remember when you were dating and felt the same. There you go! So there’s no harm trying.

But why make friends? Because they are important. As we grow older, our problems, emotions, and struggles grow too. When you are emotionally down or need a boost, they will be there, just a call away to cheer you up. You need not even share your problems with these new friends, but their companionship will make a real difference. If you are going through an illness, friends are always ready to help you. If you are following an unhealthy habit, there will be that one friend who eats your head to stop doing that and encourages you to change your lifestyle. If you are a parent, having another person who understands the difficulty in bringing up a child will be a common ground to build a relationship. Even in a career, a few market ideas, openings, or client references from someone close will only make your life better.

These friendships bring diverse perspectives and life experiences to the table, enriching our understanding of the world. Interacting with friends who have different backgrounds or views helps us broaden our horizons, challenging our thoughts and beliefs in a positive way. Through these connections, we learn more about ourselves and the world around us, gaining valuable insights that contribute meaningfully to our personal development and overall growth.

But how to make and keep friends as adults. If you have moved into a new city, making new friends becomes more of a necessity. They may be able to assist you through the smallest details like where to buy your everyday groceries or where to go to catch a particular bus. Or even other details like where to go on a weekend holiday. They might even be your circle in the city. The easiest way to make friends in a new city would be to approach your colleagues as they are the people you see on a daily basis.

But as I said, try outside the box still. Expand from your limits. Accept invitations for gatherings or events. Try to make time to meet up with an old classmate if you have anyone in the city. This will help you have a part of your past in the new life! You never know what can make a difference.

You may want to consider adding that adult friendships also often contribute significantly and meaningfully to personal growth and learning by providing different perspectives and life experiences.

Pro Tip

While it might be difficult to make friends as an adult, do not pretend to be someone you are not to get approval from the other person.

But let us be honest– it is not very easy to make genuine friends with lasting connections as adults. Why? Check the next section to understand some of the reasons.

Why Is It Hard To Make Friends As An Adult?

There are several reasons why it can be difficult to make friends as an adult. When you are a kid or in college, you are surrounded by like-minded friends at school or in activity clubs, and you can enjoy their company freely. As an adult, you are likely to be squeezed between careers, families, and personal commitments. As time becomes a precious commodity, our social circles solidify, leaving smaller openings for newcomers. Also, adults are more likely to live in different parts of the world, which can cause them to move around a lot and make it difficult for them to form long-term relationships. Adults frequently have limited energy to invest in new friendships as they look for individuals who actually support their growth and well-being.

Tips To Make New Friends As An Adult

Here are a few tips that you must keep in mind:

• The best way to make friends as an adult would be to step out of your crib! Go out as much as you can. Make sure you don’t push yourself so much to be socially active, but twice or thrice in a week must be good enough. Be it a colleague’s birthday party, neighbor’s house party, or anyone who is generous to invite you for a gathering.
• If you are a parent, school meetings or other co-curricular activity lessons that your kids attend are a good place to hang out. You can kill some time watching your kids learn and also meet other parents there who will have something in common. Being regular here will fetch you at least one friend, if not a gang!
• But how do adults make friends virtually? Hmm. Not so difficult. Facebook and social networking groups of people with common interests are some ways to try! Your hobbies or passions like gardening, cooking, or even community volunteering are a few activities that are widely discussed and shared on social media. Connect with people in your locality or city, and voila! There you go with few people who have the same thoughts as you.
• Where do adults go to make friends? Hahaha! As funny as it sounds, there really are some places where you can find a new best pal someday. Visit your favorite book shops on weekends, hang out at the park in the evenings, or take your dog out on a walk every day. You can also go to the gym, fitness clubs or join any sports team. Physical activities are not only meant for taking care of the body but the mind as well. If you make it regular, this can be a place where you can make new friends. Or just take a stroll outside sometimes. Everywhere you meet a lot of new faces, start with a greeting and small talk about the weather, and there you will undoubtedly make another friend. What you need to keep in your mind while you head out is that the world is open if you are ready to be open.
• Oh, but if your question is “how to make friends as an adult introvert”, then you gotta work a little harder, my pal. No, you don’t have to change who you are, but you gotta start getting outta your shackles and look around. This world is filled with beautiful souls. Go ahead and talk to people, at least. You never know, you might land a best friend too!
• Always mind that everyone goes through rough phases in life, and when your new friends are not available, do not push them so hard; instead, respect each other’s space. Drop a text or voice note that you are there if necessary, and get into their private space only if they invite you. We all know that as we are adults. There will be situations when all of us need some “me time” to figure things out.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why is it hard for adults to make friends?

As you grow old, your priorities change, and you don’t have as much time as you used to have as a kid to spend with your friends. Also, what you look for in a friend as an adult differs from how you used to become friends as a kid. These factors make it hard for adults to make friends.

Can you make friends after 25?

Yes. You can make friends even after 25. There is no fixed timeframe to make friends.

Why do I struggle to keep friends?

Social anxiety, trust issues, lack of time, and communication issues are some factors that can make it difficult for you to keep friends.

Learn the best ways to make friends as an adult. From social tips to building connections, discover effective strategies to form meaningful friendships in your grown-up years. Check out the video to know more!

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Bayu PrihanditoLife Coach

     

Bayu Prihandito is a life coach, a certified psychology consultant, and an RYT 200 yoga teacher. He is also the founder of Life Architekture, a platform focusing on relationships, mindfulness, emotional Intelligence, and personal development.

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